This is being cross-posted from Mark Cunnigham’s "Marknosis" list in response to a query on how to guide a lover into an orgasm experience. See the original post in that group for the full context. I am merely setting my response here which I cross-posted to the Hypnosis Technique Exchange here . . .
I have a question about opening up a females potential to truly mind blowing Orgasms. A girl I just started dating is highly sexual and really enjoys our intimate time share but she has never had the big O in her life (not for lack of trying mind you) so I have taken it upon myself being the heroic lover that I am to take her into this wonderful realm of experience.
You’ve had some interesting responses, some particularly worth noting for helpfulness. Mark had some worthwhile comments.
Sounds like you’ve put a lot of stake into this whole blow her mind witha full on body shaking orgasm thing . . . both for you and for her. It also sounds like you’ve done some nice experimentation that she may respond to nicely.
However . . . while full body massage is nice and cunnilingus is wonderful (assuming you both enjoy it, that is . . . cunnilingus for cunnilingus’ sake is nothing, it should never be chore but a joy . . . same with fellatio, annilingus, or any other lingus activity you might wish to indulge in . . . your question is not about how to have an intense erotic experience but about how to guide someone into an orgasm via hypnotic suggestion.
So, what part of your "program" has to do with hypnosis? In between the massages and venus butterfly tongue dives, have you done any hypnosis with her, erotic or otherwise?
Let us know what your experience with hypnosis is with this woman and perhaps you can get more direct and practical feedback.
There are a number of ways to hypnotically "induce" an orgasm.
Your description of things makes me thing that you might enjoy using something indirect like Wendi Friesen’s "Big O" process although while I’ve used that for fun and experimentation with some folks in the past, I prefer more straightforward and direct hypnotic approaches to things. I did use Wendi’s process once in a workshop for fun with a fellow who didn’t know what it was "for" without ever mentioning the "erotic" context and it still got a nice physical/emotional high response (albeit, no orgasm, although that wasn’t the actual goal of the experimentation anyway).
If she’s a delightful high responder, then simply achieving somnambulism and then giving suggestions for "increased arousal" leading to a straight on count down to orgasm often works fine ("with every number I say, your pussy gets more and mnore sensitive and you feel that erotic charge throughout your entire body so that with each number you become much much more aroused, perhaps even one hundred times more horny/aroused and when I reach the number one you explode in a wonderful orgasm . . . five . . . four . . . three . . . four . . . three . . . almost there . . . two . . . get ready . . . three . . . two . . . at the next number . . . one . . . boom" or some such).
Another option is to use an open-image guided imagery so that she enters into a space in her head to imagine and experience physically a fantasy scenario and you merely intensify the experiences (I have posted a few scripts of this type, both guided and unguided on my blog, webpage, and discussion list) but it’s a fairly simple concept.
Setting up posthypnotic suggestions for arousal and/or orgasm also work.
I suggest intensifying erotic response rather than orgasm triggers as there is the temptation, once set, to explode orgasms all over the place and they can get tiring for many women so that they begin letting go of the trigger, but arousal is usually much more fun and playful and that can then lead to orgasm. I had a young woman runnig the gamut of intensified erotic response last Friday night in my show (first time trance subject) and only did the orgasm after running up and down intensified arousal so when I did the handshake orgasm she was pretty damned vocal and then I dropped that trigger and gave her a self-trigger for arousal and then her own count down to orgasm that she could use at any time. I would suggest giving her a trigger of her own for your girl is worthwhile, something she can play with privately and with you or whomever she wishes to share it with in a way that is PLAYFUL and FOR HER OWN EXPERIENCE and not merely because you want to be the "heroic" lover . . . albeit, once you get the hang of it, it is not difficult to achieve. Let her know it’s okay to stop thinking of herself as non-orgasmic, rather she has been pre-orgasmic, that’s all. I can say with absolute honesty that I have never had an intimate experience with a non-orgasmic woman as every single woman I ever had such an experience with was/is multi-orgasmic . . . part of that is knowing the language to use and the way to "do things" such as guiding your partner’s imaginative involvement into the experience of experiencing erotic response and mutual pleasure.
Remember . . . the goal of lovemaking is NOT merely an orgasm, albeit orgasms are pretty damned nifty. It’s a mutually pleasurable experience . . . which in turn often leads to orgasm.
Good luck!
BTW, the HYPNOTICON hypnosis convention in February will have a few workshops on this very subject, as well as seminars, workshops, and panels on a whole range of topics that we don’t usually get to see at other less alternative-friendly conventions. Those of you who can be in Atlanta, Feb. 1-3, 2008, are in for quite the treat.
All the best,
Brian
I will see some of you at the
February Walkabout Trance Beach Resort Getaway!
Brian David Phillips, PhD, CH [phillips@nccu.edu.tw]Certified Hypnotherapist
President, Society of Experiential Trance
Associate Professor, NCCU, Taipei, Taiwan
http://www.BrianDavidPhillips.com
