So, a hypnotist in the UK has been accused of sexually assaulting a woman after putting her into a trance
It seems the fact that he has had an interest in sexually themed hypnosis is becoming an issue in the case. So what, the key to the case is not that he had previous interest in hypnosis but that he may have assaulted the young woman. He says he probably used inappropriate suggestions but that he definitely didn’t touch her but he can’t remember because he was drunk.
Gary Naraido, 52, denies assaulting the 22-year-old in the bar of a Hull hotel. He admits to the hypnosis which he’s been doing for a while but denies touching her. The accusation says that he manipulated her and touched her and put her hand on his penis while she was in trance.
As part of the investigation, the police found that his computer had search terms related to the DVD Harry the Horny Hypnotist and that Naraido had also watched other films, on YouTube, of sexually themed hypnosis, particularly those that employed the word kapow to bring women to orgasm (evidently Naraido also used that word with the young woman). Seriously, his past interest in sensual hypnosis is not really the point. Not everyone who watches videos goes out and drunkenly assaults people. The assumption is guilt by association or that because he may have done something inappropriate, watching the videos is inappropriate.
Naraido had met the girl in the bar and told her he was a hypnotist and that he would be happy to hypnotize her for about twenty minutes and he would help her sort her life problems for no charge. Two witnesses say that things got sexual and Naraido admits that he probably did go into that direction but that he doesn’t remember since he was drunk at the time but he denies touching her or having her touch him (the witnesses say otherwise).
Regular readers here know that I teach erotic hypnosis and they also know that push the concept of informed consent big time. I know there are a couple trainers out there who tell their students they regularly seduce clients using erotic methods and push the whole trick ’em into sleeping with you pickup artist nonsense mentality but my ethics go another route. [Note, there are pickup artist programs that do not rely upon trickery but upon honest forthright communication, just so you know, I’m in no way attacking PUAs in general, just the sleazefactories.]
This is why I teach my students in erotic hypnosis . . . CONSENT, CONSENT, INFORMED CONSENT . . . not implied consent, but explicit informed consent.
Honestly, Naraido blew it, big time. Just because a young woman is up for some hypnosis in a bar doesn’t mean she’s interested in taking it further with you. If you want to practice arousal sets or orgasm suggestions, make sure your trance partner understands that’s the direction you wish to take the trance and that’s what’s going to happen.
It’s clear from this article exactly what happened and what went wrong and the implication is that he took things to a sexual nature without prior consent.
Seriously, folks, CONSENT. It isn’t that hard to find a willing partner who would like to give the ol’ arousal and orgasm suggestions a go so there’s absolutely no need to try to trick folks into it (hint, if you feel you can only succeed through trickery then you really need to re-think your lifescript and make some serious changes).
As to the content of Naraido’s search browser, it doesn’t matter if he has had a previous interest in sexually themed hypnosis videos. Most folks who do, don’t assault women in bars and many who assault have no such previous interest. He was drunk and he was stupid. I’ve seen the videos mentioned in this case (well the ones specifically mentioned in the coverage) as have a LOT of folks. Some of the material out there is silly and stupid and most folks get that it’s silly and stupid – fantasy, folks. Some of it is excellent and incredibly ethical (such as at least one series specifically mentioned in the case coverage).
On the specific content mentioned, Harry the Horny Hypnotist is staged fiction which implies Harry can cause volunteers from his stage audience to do x-rated things but it’s a staged show with confederate volunteers. Sorry, it ain’t real. Oh, it is funny and it can be shocking to those who don’t recognize it as a faux piece as it is presented as if it’s a real documentary on a genuine hypnotist and that the stage show performed in front of a live audience in a club is genuine but it’s staged nonetheless, much as some of the Dr. Feelgood hypnorape porn videos are also fictional and staged, and even if it were genuine that doesn’t make it okay to give the methods a go. Seriously, folks, even if you could randomly walk up to strangers and use hypnosis to get them to do any ol’ perverse thing you want them to that doesn’t make it okay to give it a go. You can pick knife and walk up to strangers in dark alleys and plunge it into them but you don’t . . . and I hope it’s not just because you’re afraid of getting caught that you don’t. I hope you don’t have an interest in doing something so awful and you know it’s wrong even if you did. Oh, sure, there are idiots out there who use rohypnol and liquor to get girls loopy so they can have sex with them but those men are rapists. Hypnosis is a different animal and if you wish to use it for rape, you’re barking up the wrong tree anyway as there are faster more effective methods . . . or . . . and here’s novel fucking thought, don’t be a fucking rapist. You want to experiment with erotic hypnosis with an attractive young woman? Well, then ask. “Excuse me, miss, would you be interested in experiencing a powerful sensual experience with the power of your mind?” It isn’t rocket science.
As to the KAPOW hypnotist, that’s Count Spankula of the Hypnogirls franchise and that’s very real stuff, yes, he used real genuine hypnosis – see Annie Cruz go Kapow here – but Spankula’s videos also were extremely clear on the whole INFORMED CONSENT thing and while he absolutely worked with girls who stripped naked and had all sorts of explicit reactions to his suggestions, they were always fully informed of what would happen beforehand and they were always told that if at any time they felt uncomfortable they could stop the session. He worked with professional adult models and he dotted his t’s and crossed his i’s in every turn to ensure their comfort with the sessions.
It is absolutely unfortunate that Naraido’s case is bringing in some negative press to an area of hypnosis which helps a LOT of folks enhance their intimate relations. However, it’s worth the wakeup call for folks to be aware of context and to keep things up front and honest and always have informed consent.
Quick clarification, I did not teach Naraido, he was not my student. I don’t know him and never heard of him until this story broke. I posted this piece as an illustration on the need for consent when performing erotic hypnosis, that is all. Some folks have wrongly jumped to the conclusion that he must have been my student. Nope.
For more on the Naraido case, see http://www.hulldailymail.co.uk/Man-accused-assaulting-woman-trance-admits/story-26822672-detail/story.html, http://www.hulldailymail.co.uk/Man-accused-sex-assault-woman-trance-searched/story-26807110-detail/story.html, and http://www.hulldailymail.co.uk/Hypnotist-accused-abusing-woman-Hull-hotel-8216/story-26799750-detail/story.html.
And remember . . . informed consent is your friend.
Now, I do offer hypnotherapy for individuals or couples who wish to address issues related to sexuality and I’ve taught a number of workshops for couples in Taiwan, Hong Kong, India, the United States, and elsewhere. In fact, if you would like to attend or even sponsor one of our Eroticatrance events, drop Lorraine a line via the contact on our webpages for details.
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